Handling Stress in Children

Approaches to simplifying your children's lives in order to lessen the stress that will impact their growth and development.

Expert: Kim John Payne

Positive Parenting Conference by: A Fine Parent

TAKEAWAY 1:

When children feel safe and secure, they are no longer in flight or fight mode, and the release of adrenaline is calmed down. With cumulative stress, the child goes into the disorder zone, and all of a sudden a child is diagnosed, and usually medicated.

TAKEAWAY 2:

A drug free and cost free solution is available, and this is by means of simplifying their lives, not letting your child think there is something wrong with them. 

TAKEAWAY 3:

There is no such thing as "stress proof." We are not biologically built this way, we are not built to cope this way! One might think that you handle stress well, but what it actually is, is an adrenaline junkie!

TAKEAWAY 4:

In today’s society with the rat race, we feel that we need our children to do more in order to achieve and not be left behind, when in fact, you are disadvantaging them because they need the down time. They need the quiet time.

TAKEAWAY 5:

Children need down time to “clean up and reset”. In that down time when they have the time to play and be bored,  they have the opportunity to problem solve, to be creative and to be innovative.

TAKEAWAY 6:

How does one do this? By simply, SIMPLIFYING their lives. Simplify their:

1) Environment (clothes, toys, books etc)

2) Rhythms (routines - make their lives predictable so they know what to expect)

3) Schedules (too much going on every day with extra murals - give them more time to be calm, creative and productive)

4) Adult information received (too much information enhances stress)

TAKEAWAY 7:

When children don’t have to cope with life anymore, but are rather living life, there is a definite increase in a child’s abilities in school and cognitive work.

TAKEAWAY 8:

4 questions a parent needs to ask when making decisions:

Is it kind?

Is it necessary?

Is it truthful? 

Will is make my child feel secure?

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Kim John Payne's

FREE PODCAST

THE SIMPLICITY PARENTING PODCAST:

PRESENTATION

THE OVERWHELM OF BOYS

"This presentation – designed for teachers, therapists, mothers, fathers, daughters and sons – presents and explores a number of subjects related to roles and role modeling for boys. From the early years through to the later teen stages, we look at expressions of male roles – from hunter gatherer, to farmer provider, then on to explorer, athlete, conqueror, navigator and, finally, the revolutionary teenage warrior. Throughout the presentation, we keep in mind several key theme

  • Helping our boys know where healthy assertion ends and aggression begin;

  • Boys and work. Helping boys “make their mark”;

  • What boys need in their environment as they grow;

  • Fathers and boys. Rethinking traditional roles are they role models or real models?;

  • The myth of quality time;

  • Helping boys respect girls and women;

  • Honoring boy’s feelings as well as actions;

  • Helping boys talk about problems;

  • The Warrior phases – what are they and how

  • to meet them?"

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